


Here Are My Keys, Now Marry Me

by Synxailla



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel in the Bunker, Concussed Sam, Crack, Crack-ish, M/M, Pre-Mark of Cain, in denial of Gadreel possessing Sam, pre-stolen grace, yeah I totes ignored canon so this is crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-21
Updated: 2014-09-21
Packaged: 2018-02-18 07:35:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2340296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Synxailla/pseuds/Synxailla
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean sends Castiel out of the bunker to get pain meds for Sam's concussion. Upon knowing Dean let Cas drive his car, Sam starts teasing his big brother…</p>
            </blockquote>





	Here Are My Keys, Now Marry Me

**Author's Note:**

> Short and crack-ish. From the first line prompt generator ‘Reluctantly, he handed over the keys’

Reluctantly, he handed over the keys. "Remember to check your mirrors, signal before you make a turn, don’t crowd others, and honk loudly if other drivers are being assholes."

"Alright." Castiel answered solemnly if a bit somberly. "I have driven a couple of times before. I am aware of the basic rules."

 "I know, just…" Dean trailed off and sighed. "Okay. Remember, no speeding. You don’t have a license so it’s best to keep out of the cops’ notice, alright?"

"I will." Castiel answered again, just as solemn and somber.

A few seconds of staring at each other in silent assessment later, Dean finally gave a tentative but approving nod. Castiel turned to walk up the stairs leading to the bunker’s main door. He made it halfway up before Dean’s urgent voice rang out again, making Castiel stop and turn.

"And remember to keep your eyes on the road and keep the doors locked okay?!" Dean shouted over. "And at any sign of trouble, you call alright?"

"Alright." Castiel answered again, just as solemn and somber, but somehow also gentler. "It’s fine Dean, I’ll be careful, I’ll do my best to keep your car safe. Just focus on looking after Sam. I'll come back soon."

At that, Dean’s tense shoulders relaxed a bit. Cas'll come back. He  _always_ comes back.

"Yeah. Just…" Dean stopped abruptly again and released an irritated huff of breath. He waved a hand in a shooing gesture. "Yeah okay, get going. I’ll see you later Cas."

It was Castiel’s turn to give a nod. He resumed climbing up the stairs, and once he was at the top, he looked back to Dean and gave a small almost-smile.

"Goodbye Dean." Cas said. He was getting better at that; actually saying bye and not just leaving without a word.

"Later Cas." Dean shot back a small quirk of lips of his own.

The door opened and closed, swallowing Cas to the outside world filled with sunshine and civilians who have no reason to attack graceless fallen angels just for existing… Dean wished knowing that statistically, Cas is safe from civilians, and that his brand new tattoo puts him under the radar of anything supernatural, could take the itch off to run out after Cas and drag him back inside.

As it was though, Dean just made do with checking that his phone was in his pocket and keeping count of the time Cas was out. A trip to the nearest convenience store/pharmacy shouldn’t take more than 20 minutes tops via his baby right?

Dean sighed and walked back to the bunker’s living area. He groaned when he saw that the armchair he’d deposited his giant /concussed/ little brother was empty and that the icebag he repeatedly told him to hold to his swelling bump of a head, was lying on some soggy papers.

"Regular Sam is going to be so pissed at concussed Sam after this." Dean muttered as he inspected the damage done to Sam’s recent review of whatever research it was littering the desk. Dean just dumped a conveniently close rag over the small flood on the table to help soak it up before he left the room to go hunting for his brother.

Concussed persons shouldn’t be left to their own devices for too long.

Of course where else would Dean find Sam hiding but in the library? Making sure to make enough noise as he approached so as not to startle Sam, Dean smiled and waved at his brother.

"Hey Sammy. Anything hurting?"

Sam looked up from the book in his hands he was frowning confusedly at. He turned his confused stare at Dean.

"Dean?" Sam said, standing in front of the shelves with a dubious look on his face that he again directed back to the book. "I was in the den, but I don’t remember why I was there, and I tried to think back but what I last remember was I had to get something from the library, and I came here and… This isn’t the book I was looking for."

"Yeah no," Dean answered, pointing further to the room where a big ass book rested on the floor.

“ _That’s_  the book you were looking for. And it was on a crazy high shelf or something, because you missed grabbing it and it clonked you out after hitting your noggin good.”

Sam followed Dean’s index finger, and blinked at the perpetrator.

"Oh." Sam said, then he placed the smaller book he was holding back in the shelf. He turned back and gave a goofy not-exactly-lucid smile at Dean. "I think I’m concussed."

Dean snorted a laugh.

"Yeah, Cas and I figured that when you woke up and gave us nothing but glassy eyes."

He walked over to his brother and handed him the slowly melting icepack wrapped in a small towel.

"Thanks," Sam mumbled, gingerly placing the bag over the bump on his head. "Where’s Cas?" he asked, peering behind Dean as if his older brother stashed the former angel somewhere behind his back.

"Went out for some drugs." Dean said with a shrug. "You were moaning about your head hurting ‘soooooo baaaaaaadd’ a fewl seconds after you woke up, and our med supply’s lacking."

Actually, their med supply was full of strong painkillers that usually do them wonders with their posthunt injuries, but sadly, they don’t have anything mildly safe for concussed people to take without risking worsening the injury.

"C’mon big guy," Dean said, getting a hand on his giant little brother's arm. "Let’s get you on a chair before you fall over and hit your head again."

Dean kept a hand on Sam’s arm as they moved over to the armchairs. Once Sam’s butt hit the cushions, the giant man immediately melted into the chair like a jellyfish.

"This chair's comfy. Like clouds, only not so fluffy." Sam said "Like it's in the middle of its workout regime to get this right amount of firmness and give."

Dean stood beside him, shaking his head with a snort. He's never regretted having a cheap disposable phone instead of those smart ones with video cameras more than this monent.

"Yeah buddy chairs are awesome." Dean said with a teasing smile that flew over Sam's wonky head.

"I feel sorry for Cas." Sam said a couple of seconds later. "It’s a loooooooong walk to the pills store."

Dean couldn’t help the chuckle.  _Pills store._

"Why would he walk?" He asked, being the great big brother he was and humoring Sam.

"Well he can’t fly anymore! DUH!" Sam said, giving Dean a funny look.

"Yeah, but he can drive." Dean said with a roll of his eyes.

The thud of the icepack dropping to the floor sounded, and Dean sighed as he bended over to pick it up. When he straightened to hand it back to Sam, Dean saw his brother giving him a surprised look.

"You let him drive your car?" Sam asked, sounding serious, very far from the silly concussed Sam he was being moments ago.

"Uh… Yeah." Dean said, giving Sam a curious stare. "Baby’s the only working car we have right now."

At Dean’s confirmation, Sam’s surprised expression level upped into shock.

"I knew it." Sam whispered.

"What?" Dean asked, confused.

"You’re banging him."

Dean turned bright red.

"SAM!" He shouted in protest, but his brother just sagely nodded to himself as if he was expecting it all along. "That’s not true and you know it."

"Yeah, I would’ve heard you guys going at it if it was." Sam said with a sad look that turned into disgust when he realized he just talked about hearing his brother doing the nasty.

"Sam, can we please not talk about things that aren’t happening?"

"Yeah okay." Sam agreed with an evil smile. "How about talking about things that  _will be_  happening?” he wiggled his eyebrows in a disturbing way. “When do you plan on tapping that? And by that I mean Castiel.”

"Seriously Sam." Dean said, huffing in frustration. "Where is this even coming from?"

"Oh it’s been a long time coming." Sam said, nodding sagely again. "A looooooooonngg time coming."

"Yeah no." Dean said, trying to sound stern while his cheeks flamed away. "There’s nothing going on between me and Cas and it’ll stay that way. So stop reading too much into it okay?"

"Pssshh," Sam said and rolled his eyes so hard he winced in pain as it hurt his head. When he recovered though, he gave Dean a disbelieving look. "Dude, you gave him your car keys and let him drive your car! That’s like, one step short of proposing to a person in your fucked up language."

"I don’t have a fucked up language." Dean muttered.

"You totally do," Sam said, "and you just asked Cas to marry you."

"You’re concussed." Dean accused.

"I may be concussed but  _you’re_  in loooouuurrrvveee.” Sam said and proceeded to laugh his ass off like a giant tickled baby.

"If you didn’t have a serious head injury right now, I’d be beating you down." Dean said through gritted teeth.

"See? You’re not even bothering denying it anymore!" Sam said with a triumphant loopy grin. He took in a big gulp of breath, puffing his cheeks dramatically, preparing to spout something very sinister, but Dean beat him to the punch.

"If you start singing a song involving me and Cas and a tree I’ll forget we’re brothers and smack you in spite of your concussion." Dean threatened.

"Pfffffffffffwhoooooosh." Sam said as he took Dean’s warning to heart and thankfully released his breath.

"Giant pain in the ass." Dean grumbled and none too gently placed the icepack on Sam’s head.

"Ow!" Sam said and batted Dean’s hand away, his own coming up to hold the towel wrapped icepack in place. "You’re such a jerk Dean." he grumbled miserably.

"Well stop being such a bitch." Dean countered. He gave his sitting brother one last glare before he dropped into the chair across Sam’s.

Dean huffed in a very dignified manner and crossed his arms over his chest in a mature way to indicate he was upset with Sam. Across from him, Sam rolled his eyes, successfully managing not to wince in pain this time.

"Oh c’mon Dean, don’t act all prissy." Sam said. "I’m sorry okay? I’m sorry I worked out for myself that you’re in love with Cas before you could work up the courage to actually tell me."

"Sammy just stop okay!" Dean shouted from his seat. Sam just seemed pleased with himself at yet again provoking Dean.

"Stop what?" Sam asked with a smile on his face and a challenge in his tone of voice. "What do you want me to stop? Can’t say it can you? You’re such a chicken Dean, can’t even bear to hear it."

Dean tried telling himself not to stoop to his concussed brother’s level of thinking, but he wasn’t that strong of a man.

"I’m no chicken."

"Oh yeah? Then say it. What do you want me to stop so bad huh? Afraid of words? Jeez Dean they won’t hurt you." Sam said, smirking like he’s the goddamn inventor of sliced bread. "You gotta face the truth man, and you can’t keep your feelings bottled up forever. Just admit that you’re—."

"STOP SAYING I’M IN LOVE WITH CAS DAMNIT." Dean shouted and he and Sammy fell into stunned silence. Because right after the last word left Dean’s mouth, the familiar sound of the bunker’s heavily warded main door shutting closed echoed outside the library.

Dean pushed down the panic bubbling in his gut as he heard Cas’s footsteps nearing their location. He gave Sam another glare.

"If you breathe one word of this to him…" Dean let the threat hang in the air between them. He’d feel a lot better if Sam wasn’t stuffing his mouth closed with giggles, but he took the other hunter’s nod as a grudging sign of agreement.

"Dean?" Cas’s voice called from somewhere, probably the living area. "Sam?"

"Yeah Cas, we’re in the library!" Dean called out. He shot Sam another glare to stuff the giggles.

"There you are." Cas said, coming in the doorway and walking straight toward Dean.

He was carrying a rather large paperbag clutched to his chest, one handed. He extended his other hand closefisted toward Dean.

Dean offered up his hand palm out and Cas placed his fist in it, opening it out to give back the Imapala’s keys. The drag of Castiel’s hand as he pulled away was warm and distracting.

"I parked your car under some trees outside and locked the doors. You can move her later if you wish." Cas said with an incline of his head. "The car’s perfectly fine."

"Yeah, thanks." Dean said absently, clutching the still warm keys in his hand.

"I obtained medicine for your headache Sam." Cas said, turning away from Dean. "I didn’t know how many to get, but I think these would suffice."

"That big bag is filled with paracetamol?" Sam asked brows crossing together in worry. "I don’t need  _that_ much Cas.”

Cas looked down to the bag he was carrying with a straight face. “Oh, not all of its contents are pills,” he said lifting the bag in question. “I also brought this from the store.”

Cas stuck his other arm in the bag and, like the world was going in slow motion, pulled out a familiar container, then he turned to give Dean a smile and placed the box on the arm of Dean’s chair. The word PIE stared up at Dean in proud announcement from the clear plastic container of the store bought pastry. Dean felt his heart squeeze and his gut flutter.

Castiel bought him pie.

The silence in the room was broken by Sam’s icepack thudding down to the floor again.

Cas turned to Sam, seemingly obvlivious of Dean having an internal panic attack and on the verge of throwing Cas against the nearest bookshelf and kissing the former angel senseless, Sam watching be damned… Cas walked over beside Sam where the icepack dropped on the ground and bent over to pick it up. When he got up to give the cold pack back to Sam, Cas tilted his head to the side as he was met with a wide-eyed shocked look from the younger hunter.

"Sam? Are you alright?" Castiel asked in concern.

Sam just continued to stare in shock at Castiel for a couple of seconds more.

"Is it your head?" Cas asked, concern growing. "Do you need professional medical attention?"

"I—Oh my god." Sam said, finally breaking his silence, but still outright staring at Castiel. His eyes moved from Cas, to Dean, to the pie Dean was still staring at.

"Oh my god." Sam said to Castiel again. "You totally want to bang my brother."

Castiel blinked. Dean blushed and groaned.

end

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading :3


End file.
